George W, short chubby actors and the world's best impersonator.

I'm starting to believe that fear is the world's best impersonator.

You ever listen to a great impersonator with your eyes closed? It's amazing isn't it?

It's like that other actual person being impersonated is right there in the room with you. Except they are not. That's not George Bush. That's a short chubby actor mimicking the voice and mannerisms of W. It's called an impersonation.

And that my friends is how fear rolls.

You close your mind long enough and fear will start to sound a lot like patience...Or wisdom... Or love... Or faith... Or even... wait for it... courage.

It's impressive really how having great fear can sound a lot like having great courage. Case in point...

There's this dream I've always had. It's something I've wanted to do for a long, long time. I took a baby step towards it a while ago but for the most part I haven't done or attempted to take any significant steps towards this dream.

You know why?

Because I'm patience... and wise... and trusting God... and super duper busy and courageous. 

So yea I've got a dream I've buried in the sand but it's okay cause I've got plenty of good reasons. At least that's what I've been hearing for the last year with my eyes closed shut.

But lately Gods been slowly opening the eyes of my heart and every time he does and I take a peak, I don't see patience, wisdom or faith.

I see... the world's best impersonator; fear.

That's it. FEAR. Yea, it's like a short chubby actor trying so hard to convince us it's something else.

You wanna know the real reason I haven't done anything about my dream to write a book? (gasp, I don't believe I just kind of said that out loud).

Because I'm afraid. I'm a wuss.

That's it. Plain and simple. I'm scared.

[I'm scared of trying and because I'm scared of bombing. I'm scared because I think I'm inadequate. I'm scared because I can name ten thousand authors who are better than me. I'm scared that no one except family and nice friends would ever buy a book I write.

I'm scared of being the author equivalent of that guy on American Idol who makes a fool of himself on a public platform because he thought he had a gift.

I'm scared I don't have anything significant to offer in this area. I'm scared of trying when there are so many in this field. I'm scared of failing. I'm scared that my ability and gifts don't match up to my dreams. I'm afraid that the 'writing luck' I've found on this blog will eventually run out. I'm scared of reading that first bad book review and the next 100]

You know what the worst part of all this is?

I can comfortably go the next 10 years and never pursue this dream. All I have to do is allow my fear to impersonate those awesome things I listed above.

I can easily convince myself that the reason I'm being passive is because it's not Gods will. So really I'm just trying to glorify God by not taking action steps because it's not about me or something I want really bad. It's about him.

See what I just did there?

Told you fear is a great actor.

Dang.

Anyways, there it is. My cards are on the table. I can literally almost hear my heart beat as I write this post. I don't know what in the world God has in store and I haven't made any plans yet to write but I'm excited. Freaked out but excited to just say this is something i desire.

It's a small step but now that I got it out, it'll be a little harder to fake my fears.

Anyone else wanna show their hands? What are you not doing because you're afraid?

Wanna tell us about your dreams and the fears that hold them captive?

Be honest, how are you dealing with fear these days?