Predicting the future: Top Ten Things That Will be Different in the Year 2075

The last couple posts have been a bit weighty emotionally so if its okay with you guys, I'm gonna dial down a bit and try to make 'a funny'.

I'm gonna hop on my Delorean and fly to the year 2075. If you’ve ever wondered what the future holds, wonder no more because I am about to tell you.

Below are the top 10 things that will be different in the year 2075. Enjoy, but don’t forget to tip your waiter...

1. Aliens will finally invade the earth but contrary to popular belief, there won’t be a war of the worlds. They will offer us alien cheesecake and access to their cable T.V in exchange for peaceful living and equality. We will accept. [Think about it, it’s alien CABLE T.V]

They will become a part of everyday life and consequently give us much needed fresh material for reality T.V. I’m guessing an alien will probably win American idol that year.

2. There will be a world mascot. Every 4 years countries will have a mascot competition and the winning mascot will be world mascot for the next 3 years.

Canada will be banned from entering into this competition just because it’s funny to the rest of the world.

3. In the year 2075, everything will take only 3 seconds but women will still spend 8 seconds fixing their hair. We will probably vote in a female president just so we don’t have to hear about it for another 100 years.

Consequently wives will say to their husbands “look! We’re about to win the battle of sexes” and husbands will reply “go ahead, we’re just going to watch the game”

4. We will celebrate Dr Phil day as a national holiday. Need I say more?

5. Although ‘land before time’ part 496 will give them a run for their money, Popular soap opera passions will win an Emmy for having the longest running plot ever (1990-2075 and counting).

6. Year 2075: The browns win their first Super-bowl. Just kidding... :)

7. Out of fear sparked by movies such as terminator and I-robot, we will not build fully functioning human robots. We will however build robotic parts to enhance our daily life. For instance everyone will probably have an extra pair of prosthetic arms which will allow you such luxury as playing video games against yourself or playing a guitar with two hands while raising your other two hands at the same time during worship. Imagine!

8. Crime will be at an all time low, as law enforcement will replace police officers with ninja’s. Why? Ok so I’m a thug and I just grabbed an old ladies purse down the dark alley. Oh no! What’s that in the shadows? What was that sound? I make a break for it. Oh no! A ninja star stuck in my back. I’m on the floor. I see nothing the whole time but feel the intense pain of nun chucks knocking my tooth out. I reach for my laser gun.

What gun? He already has it. Crap I’m going to prison in Mars…  Or I’m speeding and what do I know? There’s a ninja cop on top of my car! How did he get there? What? Now he’s riding in shotgun. But how did that happen? He was just on top of my car. Dang it! I’m getting another ticket.

9. Millions will mentally tune their 6-d T.V to watch the biggest television event ever: interview with Sasquatch.

10. Jesus will come back for sure. Or not, for sure. Maybe he won’t come back for another 75 years for sure. Or maybe he already came back for sure. Who knows for sure? No one knows for sure. Either way, one things for sure, only one thing will really matter in 75 years. Did I live for my glory or Gods? my fame or his? Its the only thing that will matter because my fame will die. I will die.

Most of the stuff I own now will be in a junk yard. My family will barely remember me. Sounds depressing. But not if I lived my life in a way that glorified him. Not if at the end, he says to me ‘welcome good and faithful servant’.
 

Besides #10 :), what's your favorite part about the year 2075? what made you laugh the most? got anything to add to the list? predictions of your own? Don't be shy. Jump in.

Ok, fine. I'll let u tell me how excited you are that Jesus is coming back soon.