Why getting beat up in a dream reminds me of marriage!

Marriage is hard. Period. Doesn’t matter if you married the Apostle Paul, Jonathan Edwards and BIlly Graham mashed in one. Marriage is hard and it has nothing to do with your spouse...

Marriage will test you, break you and humble you. It will push you to your last straw. Just when you feel like you have absolutely nothing left to offer, marriage will say give me more. Its a tremendous weight that we cannot carry. A burden too bulky to be sustained by beauty, sex or chemistry.

Two broken, selfish people with insatiable desires trying endlessly to find validation in each other? Its a hopeless situation long term, unless a 3rd party, a savior is invited in to do some redemptive work. That’s not my attempt to put a pretty bow around marriage because the saviors work is quite painful.

It requires a death to self. A daily death to self. Sometimes I wish all I had to do was just fight one big giant epic battle against my selfishness and pride. But its not that easy. I have to choose to fight everyday.

A while ago I dreamed that I was in a fight with someone that was way stronger than me. He was about to overpower me when 2 guys twice his size and strength stepped up to defend me. They saved me and beat the tar out of this guy, but even then he wouldn’t stop trying to get to me. Finally after some more pounding from my friends, he laid bloodied up on the ground unable to move. I told him it was over and he looked up at me and said ‘yea but i’ll be back tomorrow’. I remember thinking man! I’m always gonna have to fight this guy.

Thats what marriage sometimes feels like. I need help from God to win today but my flesh and selfishness is so resilient that I know I’ll have to fight again tomorrow. I’ll have to fight selfishness everyday for the rest of my life. Thats a tough pill for me to swallow on some days. I guess I just have to remember to take it day by day. One battle at a time. I have to remember that I’m not alone. I’ve got someone fighting for me and His grace is enough.

Marriage is hard but we have to keep fighting cause Its worth fighting for.

I’ve only been married for 2+ years so its safe to say I won't be teaching any marriage seminars anytime soon, but the beauty of community is inexperienced people like me can learn from those who are ahead of me. The enemy knows this so he works hard to break the bridge between younger and older generations. Lets start rebuilding...

Married folks.. if there’s one thing you can tell us young folks about how to have a God glorifying successful marriage, what would it be?

Single folks, if you could ask any one question about marriage, what would it be? [nothing is off limits. nothing. If there’s something u wish married people would talk about, please ask]

Go.